The color of infinity inside an empty glass

Start with the Good News. The mechanic called this morning. The problem is that the fuel filter was really badly clogged. It won't cost much to get them to change it (less than $100) and I should have my car back by tommorow.
That IS good news!

Now the Grumpiness.
I got very upset at people on ChaoticMUX yesterday. Not just one or two but a few. People who were being stupid.
One off on some tangent about Jewish people.
One who begged me to nuke someone who (and you know who are) *I* still like, even if you don't. *I* still respect him, even if his opinions are unpopular and disliked (for good reason, but... as nissacrosseyed would say "Hate the Sin. Love the Sinner."), I still liked him.
One who, sometimes I swear, belongs on a roleplay mux where she can vent out her need to screw with others.
And one who has absolutely no problem calling people "hoar" and "anal" and doesn't care what people think about him.
That said, the problem is half mine. On days I wasn't so worried about my car or such, I'd probably be able to laugh this stuff off as just a silly thing _____ does. Everyone has their quirks: some good, some bad. The truly wise person can simply accept people for who they are.
That shows how far away from being the truly wise person I can be sometimes.
To me, I see it as... everyone was just acting out in their own particular way and before the night was over, it was too much for me and made ME grumpy with people in general.
That's the 20/20 hindsight vision, by the way. At the time, I just figured everyone had something up their ass. Maybe they do... while it isn't unknown for a large number of people to act out at once, there's usually some CAUSE for it!
What the cause(s) is/were.. I dunno. I probably never will know.
I dunno.
Truthfully said, if they all start acting out again, I'll abandon my "the truly wise person..." approach and just yell at them because, no matter what their reasons, no one should have to put up with anyone's shit.
Especially if it's stupid shit

Some people are such utter fuckwits. They do incredibly stupid things so 100% terribly certain that they're right. It's so sad, it's pathetic.
I'm past dealing out justice. Everything comes back. Those fuckwits will want things one day and I'll be damned if *I* have anything to say to them ever again.

I've had, in this livejournal, an entire journal entry on how people change. On how friendships form and friendships break. I won't get into it again. It's almost amazing to watch, though. As people change and become friends or decide they can't stand each other anymore.

I'm grumpy. I've got a big test at 11:00 (I may end up finishing this post after the test, but that's OK) that i only HOPE, at this moment, that i'm ready for. I have to meet two students today (Despite the fact that I got like.. 10 billion OTHER things to do) who are confused about a very SADISTIC homework assignment in the class I TA. *sigh*

On the good side, today is Monday and I *DID* promise a weigh-in. And so I shall give it. Today I wasy 274 lbs. (Which is.. 4 pounds less ? than it was last Monday.) Go me!

On the good side, after my long discussion yesterday on Rob Johnson and Doug Flutie. We played a really good game yesterday. We lost, but I saw Rob Johnson LOOK like a quarterback and score. I saw us THIS close to going into overtime and POSSIBLY winning. I no longer despise Rob Johnson. it was a good and tough game and we lost not because we looked like crap but because they, in the end, outplayed us that little extra bit.

On the plus side, it's not a week until Freddie comes in and that will be extremely cool.

On the plus side, I can go home and find the little trouble maker and give him snuggles (cause he's REALLY cute and you just WANT to snuggle him) and that's always good for stress relief.

Oh well, I'll end this.

OK, today's rant is about rap. The two sides.
There are two very opposite and opposed sides to rap.
Side A are those who create and listen to rap. Those who speak and understand the lingo used in the majority of these songs (for this rant, I am distinguishing true rap from R&B. Rap disgusts me, whereas R&B (I'm thinking like Will Smith here) is sometimes listenable.
As I said, Rap disgusts me. All them "Bitchez" and "Hoz" and "Get your azz moving" and whatever is derogatory, for the most part, to women, jews, gays (Earth to the critics: Eminem wasn't the first and he won't be the last. In my experience, most REAL Rap is derogatory to someone. It started out as anger music. Angry against the cops, the "white man" that depressed the almost completely black community that raps out this crap, against authority.)

On the other side, equally disgusting, is Side B. Let's call them our parents. It's not so much the group of EVERYONE'S Parents, so much as a group of people about the age of our parents. They take a rap they don't understand and all start censoring and picketting. For the record, I am by and large against censorship. Because once you begin to censor, you ALWAYS go to far.

Perfect Example (and the reason for this rap). Has anyone heard Eminem's rap "Stan". Now, personally, I won't touch most of Eminem's stuff. I think it is terribly sexist and extremely homophobic. But I genuinely like Stan because I hear him not only rapping out this flight of fantasy he had over this near-stalker-like fan, but he's poking fun of himself. I hear the lyrics to "Stan" and I am more amused than upset.
So I'm surfing channels this morning and there.. on MTV is the video for Stan. Except they are bleeping out every other word. I understand bleeping out the obscenities and bleeping out, even, the bits about the woman with the unborn child being locked in the trunk. But then they were beeping out the "What's this shit about us needing to be together." and the whole why are you cutting your wrists? I'm just clowning when I talk about that.
WHY DO YOU NEED TO BLOCK THIS OUT?
Do you think you're going to stopped innocent children from hearing about things they haven't had to deal with yet? Cause... you won't. Chances are, if they've watched MTV, they're buying albums and going to web sites an whatever. THESE KIDS ARE NOT INNOCENT. Children delving into mainstream society: The World Wide Web, TV, Movies, are NO LONGER INNOCENT!
They know a whole lot more about how guns work, how sex works, and how abuse works than you parents and your parents did combined at their age.

I agree there's a big need for change in this country. So many things that are wrong and very very scary. But this IS NOT THE WAY. You can't try to protect them AFTER THE FACT. Censoring out parts of a song that they can just download off Napster or buy in a store AREN'T GOING TO WORK!

So.. yo, to all you nasty-ass rappers out there... you guys are guilty as charged. Your rap (I try not to call it music. It's not.) is nasty, it's sexist, homophobic and racist. Clean your act up, dogs.. because you're not helping anything. I'd say you're hurting the situation.. the same one you are so angry about.. with your "bitchez" and "hoz"
To all you censors out there... get a fucking clue... Censorship does NOT work. As anyone on a diet know, by trying to stop someone from doing something, it increases the cravings to do that thing immensely. You take all the swear words and bits you don't approve of out and someone will STILL here the song properly because YOU CAN'T STOP THEM.

Anyways, maybe I'll write a "what I've been up to" post later. My rant is over now, though.

Howard