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On arguments...
Mar. 25th, 2003 11:10 pmI sometimes sit here and question my ability to think in parallel tracts with the rest of the human race.
I think in certain semi-permanent ways.
By and large, getting my point across to others is not a problem.
But sometimes I am utterly astounded how people who otherwise SHOULD understand what I'm saying don't seem to be able to.
Sometimes I can blow it off as me putting my foot in my mouth and saying something offensive when no offense was meant.
I'll be the first to admit.. I do have a tendency to do that.
Other times, I'm just blown away when others completely misunderstand where I'm coming from.
A perfect example of this was less than a year ago when I did a little research into what feminism was and started refining my opinions on this subject. People got not only downright rude but nasty about my posts.
On one hand, it's a very hot topic... on another... what started, for me, as an intellectual discussion degenerated into me being put on the defensive a number of times.
It still blows my mind away that things generated so badly there. I don't KNOW if the fault lies in myself or in others.
That lack of knowing is extremely frustrating. Especially when the same things happen over and over again.
One thing that I'm not sure people understand about me is I'm selectively open-minded.
Selectively as in... if you take a certain approach and I'm in the right mood, you might make me open my mind to different opinions and different viewpoints.
Conversely, if you don't go about it the right way or I'm in the wrong mood, I'm as stubborn as an ox.
I only bring this up because sometimes I suspect some arguments occur when people attempt to filter their values down to me in a way that either turns me off or at a time when I'm not receptive.
But, like me putting my foot in my mouth... that's not the whole story either.
Sometimes... sometimes I'm pretty sure I'm just not being understood. *I* understand the concept but for whatever reason, I'm not able to describe that concept to someone else.
I don't understand that. Maybe one day I will be able to see where my lines of thought diverge from others.. but... not today.
Sometimes I don't WANT to argue.
Sometimes I just want to be understood. To get my meaning across. To make my points heard.
Wish I knew how. :/
I think in certain semi-permanent ways.
By and large, getting my point across to others is not a problem.
But sometimes I am utterly astounded how people who otherwise SHOULD understand what I'm saying don't seem to be able to.
Sometimes I can blow it off as me putting my foot in my mouth and saying something offensive when no offense was meant.
I'll be the first to admit.. I do have a tendency to do that.
Other times, I'm just blown away when others completely misunderstand where I'm coming from.
A perfect example of this was less than a year ago when I did a little research into what feminism was and started refining my opinions on this subject. People got not only downright rude but nasty about my posts.
On one hand, it's a very hot topic... on another... what started, for me, as an intellectual discussion degenerated into me being put on the defensive a number of times.
It still blows my mind away that things generated so badly there. I don't KNOW if the fault lies in myself or in others.
That lack of knowing is extremely frustrating. Especially when the same things happen over and over again.
One thing that I'm not sure people understand about me is I'm selectively open-minded.
Selectively as in... if you take a certain approach and I'm in the right mood, you might make me open my mind to different opinions and different viewpoints.
Conversely, if you don't go about it the right way or I'm in the wrong mood, I'm as stubborn as an ox.
I only bring this up because sometimes I suspect some arguments occur when people attempt to filter their values down to me in a way that either turns me off or at a time when I'm not receptive.
But, like me putting my foot in my mouth... that's not the whole story either.
Sometimes... sometimes I'm pretty sure I'm just not being understood. *I* understand the concept but for whatever reason, I'm not able to describe that concept to someone else.
I don't understand that. Maybe one day I will be able to see where my lines of thought diverge from others.. but... not today.
Sometimes I don't WANT to argue.
Sometimes I just want to be understood. To get my meaning across. To make my points heard.
Wish I knew how. :/
